Daily Archives: November 30, 2013

A STEP BACK IN TIME…

Ok, I will now try to explain how I arrived back at this next, “cute” little story I am about to re-call about my days growing up in Fayette, OH…

I often re-read through my posts, checking and re-checking for grammatical or factual errors, and I came upon that post where I mentioned that I was 18 years old when I, OPENLY, started smoking…HAHAHA!!!  THIS IS HYSTERICAL, FOLKS!!!

ANYWAYS…there were a few of us…on our 6th grade camp-out at Harrison Lake State Park…(I’m chuckling deep inside myself at this)…who “admitted” to smoking cigs during that overnight event!!!  Yep, I WAS ONE OF THEM!!!

I remember the principal asking each of us, individually, if we had participated.  I COULD NOT LIE, even at the young age of…???  What…11?  I did not know God at that time in my life, however He was deep within me.  He knew my struggles.  Oh yes, He was with me.  Lying would have been easy.  And I WOULD have avoided punishment, however, LYING…WAS NOT AN OPTION.  I confessed to the truth and faced my punishment…like an 11 year old little girl!!!

So, the punishment?  Informing our parents…and returning to school with a hand-written note confirming that we had done so!!!  I’m just CERTAIN that I “practiced” forging this hand-written note–probably a few times before giving up.  I panicked the ENTIRE weekend, right up until Sunday afternoon!!!  I just HAD to do it and get it over with!!!  I broke down, IMMEDIATELY…crying and babbling like…an 11 year old girl caught smoking on the 6th grade camp-out at Harrison Lake State Park!!!

Boy, was that punishment horrible!!!  In retrospect, however, neither parent could say a word.  And I should have known that.  Ya see, both of my parents were “heavy” smokers.  Parent by example, right?  Wow, another realization…signs of my “inner turmoil” were actually being displayed at age 11.  DOUBLE WOW!!!

So anyways, I expect…and look forward to getting comments back from some of my 6th grade, delinquent buddies regarding memories of this event.  I do remember this as being a FUN time…at the campout…not smoking!  We each took, probably 1-3 itty-bitty “hits” off of a cigarette.  I don’t remember who brought them, but in all honesty…IT COULD HAVE BEEN ME!!!  I “snuck” cigarettes from my parents ALOT!!!  If they were Kent III’s, then I BROUGHT ’em!!!  Anyone remember?

Ah, it feels good to recount memories with a smile on my face!  WE WERE THE BEST, right?  Gorham-Fayette class of ’83!!!  OMG!!!  I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS!!!  I think my former classmates are together…RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE…at our 30 yr. HS reunion back in OH!!!  DOUBLE OMG!!!  I could not make this up, folks!!!  And I’ll BET that that 6th grade camp-out makes it into tonight’s discussion!!!  Oh, I miss you guys!!!  I am now going to FB Suzy and see if you all have access to a computer to read this post…right there…at… and DURING our 30 year reunion!!!  WOW!!!  God Bless you all!!!  It has been a very long, yet VERY short 30 years!!!

GO EAGLES!!!

 

“MY” SUFFERING…

WOW!!!  Not sure that I am ready for this, folks, but I am being “nudged”.  And I WILL move…in the direction I feel that I am being “pushed” or “pulled”…

Again…I need to pray before beginning this post as I am uncertain as to it’s consequences.  Heavenly Father, guide me.  Please help me to find the “right” words for what I am about to say.  I do so, by desiring to “Help”  people on their journeys through this life…simply seeking to survive.  Please, Lord, protect all of those impacted by what I am about to disclose about the suffering I have endured along my life’s journey.  The suffering that, certainly, brought You into my life…walking beside me(with me)…walking in front of me(guiding me)…walking behind me(to catch me)…and MOST importantly…Carrying me during those difficult times when I was too weak or broken to continue moving forward..  Praise be to Jesus.  All glory be to God!!!  Amen.

Allrighty then, with added strength…I will move forward…As a young and fragile child, folks, my life was destroyed.  I learned how to NOT trust.  I became very confused.  Angry.  Controlling…”CRAZY”.  Delusional.  Perhaps…”PSYCHO”!!!  Nothing in life made ANY sense at all!  I was NEVER happy ANYWHERE   because I WAS NOT HAPPY WITHIN MYSELF!!!

Child molestation.  Yep, I WAS A VICTIM!  Please do not get hung up on the “who”?  None of that matters anymore.  Believe me…NONE OF THAT MATTERS ANYMORE!!!  I AM A SURVIVOR, folks.  A survivor, seeking to help others survive.  I have come to believe that this is the “PURPOSE” of life…surviving and helping others to survive.  We all suffer our own, unique challenges, folks.  GOD IS WITH US!  Now, let go of the pain that is stopping you from being all that you can be. GIVE ALL THAT PAIN UNTO THE LORD.  LET IT GO.  HE WILL CARRY YOU THROUGH YOUR DARKEST HOURS.  HE  WANTS TO BE YOUR HERO!!!

WOW!  Difficult post.  I can only hope that I have hurt no one.

ALL GLORY BE TO GOD!!!  AMEN!!!

DO YOU “FEEL” WHAT I “FEEL”?

THE TIDES ARE CHANGING, AMERICA…

I “feel” it, folks.  America’s pride is returning!!!  And our God is HERE TO STAY!!! THIS IS AMERICA!!!  WE ARE ALL AMERICAN!!!  AND WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!!! GO TEAM USA!!!  AMEN!!!

First and foremost…OUR GOD IS HERE TO STAY.  I am not “dissing” ANYONE or ANYTHING, but…THIS IS AMERICA!!!  ONE NATION UNDER GOD!!!  We do not have to let go of “WHO” we are in order to welcome others into this GREAT country with OPEN ARMS!!!  WE ACCEPT EVERYONE!!!  AND WE LOVE EVERYONE!!!  We are “losing” who we are, however, by trying too hard to make others feel accepted here.

People come here “because of” who and what we are.  WE WILL NO LONGER BE THAT [great country]…IF…WE KEEP CHANGING TO BE LIKE EVERY OTHER COUNTRY!!!  WE ARE AMERICA, folks!!!  Let’s hang onto those things that…MAKE…US…GREAT!!!  GOD.  COUNTRY.  FAMILY.  FREEDOM.

“Helping people.  Help people.  Helping people WANT to help people!!!”  THAT MAKES NOOOOO SENSE, BUT…I LOVE IT!!!  “WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!!!”  I am feeling the need to play that song, “We’re All In This Together,” theme song from High School Musical (yes girls, the movie with Zac Efron…and yes guys…Vanessa Hudgens!!!)  while marching (as if I’m the sole leader out in front of a huge band, marching with knees high, holding my imaginary conductor’s wand and singing along…LOUDLY!!!)  🙂

Please let us not forget who we are.  Others have come here BECAUSE of who we are.  Now…”WHY”, on earth, would ANYBODY think of trying to change who we are???  Sorry.  But folks…”I JUST DON’T GET THAT!!!”  Let’s keep things simple, okay?  WE BECAME SOOOOO GREAT BECAUSE OF WHO WE WERE.  Now, how can we still be sooooo great…IF…WE BECOME WHO WE ARE NOT???  Hhhmmm, that sure makes ya think, doesn’t it?

KEEP IT SIMPLE, folks!  JUST KEEP IT SIMPLE!!!  AND…KEEP IT SIMPLE BY KEEPING IT…”REAL”!!!

GO TEAM!!!  WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!!!  AND…

MAY GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!  AMEN.

 

“CONNING”….THE PROFESSIONALS

This is going to be a good post, folks… IF I am able to “capture” all of those ideas that go along with it…

What was your first thought when reading the title for this post…”Conning…the professionals”?  Something negative, right?  Purposeful deceit.  A conscious decision to misguide someone’s thoughts or opinions, right?

In most instances, that is the case.  Purposeful deceit.  A conscious decision to misguide someone’s thoughts or opinions.  Gangsters!!!  Criminals!!!  Oh, yes…”these” are those few bad apples amongst the group…”Bad”…by choice.  This choice made, undeniably, as a result of an individual’s… “ISSUES,” A.K.A…:  “PLATE OF CRAP”!!!

What about those individuals who “con” professionals unknowingly?  And is that even possible?  Well, yes.  I propose that it IS possible.  And I can say that because “that”… is what I did.  It wasn’t purposeful, folks.  It was my mind’s unwillingness to accept the truth….OR…It was God protecting me until I was ready to handle that truth?  OR…was it God protecting others…from me…because He knew how I would respond to that truth?  Wow!  I’m uncertain of the answer to those questions.  They are making me think, however…

Hhhmmm.  Denial.  A protection mechanism?  Protecting whom?  The victim?  The perpetrator?  The supporting cast?  I am sinking into my own thoughts, folks.  Deeper…and…DEEPER…

I am lost, again…searching for answers to questions I’ve been asking for many, many years.  My heart aches right now, to be honest.  It aches because I am aware of my suffering.  I suddenly, however, feel uncertain as to whether God had been protecting “me” or not.  Wow!!!  I apologize, folks.  This is a difficult time for me.  I am  searching for “answers,” yet again.  Needing, desperately, to feel that I, too, “mattered” or was “worthy” of God’s protection…???  Perhaps I just need to “BE STILL”.  Yeah , that’s it.  I need to go and spend some alone time with God, my Savior…

Have a blessed evening, folks.  I feel truly blessed to have been inspired to share my life story and to use my suffering to, perhaps, “HELP” others along their difficult journey called “LIFE”.

GO TEAM!!!  WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!!!

Amen.  All glory be to God.